Dear God

Two of them? The girlfriend’s Neo Steam character.

The other two? The girlfriend’s cat.

Can you honestly pick which is which? Seriously?

Diode, hit the lights, we’re taking over this joint

I was planning on staying in newbie-friendly areas, quietly questing and clutching my testicles in fear, but a certain someone’s constant nudging towards the conflict-ridden Riall gave me the courage to venture forth. Boy, what an experience that was.

I started out by following her advice and just circling the pink shielded PVP area, killing as many mobs as I could. The two side areas (East and West) with the beetle mobs were being heavily camped, though, since they give the most experience. I started to pull mobs out of the PVP area with my bow to try to grab some, but they were being camped pretty heavily as well.

It probably took her 20-30 minutes to actually explain how PVP actually worked in this area. You couldn’t get killed outside the pink-shield area, but you can get killed in it, but you can get killed outside of it if you had been in it, but you can’t get killed inside of it if you had been killed, but you can get killed if you attacked another player. I don’t know. Eventually I just drew this and stuck to it.

After circling for an hour and gaining some experience by myself, she decided to come out and grind with me. Apparently, she had played for several thousand hours and was now kickfucking me when it came to levels. Since the mobs had been so camped on the outside, she said we should just go into the PVP area and try grinding in there.

Well, it took about a whole 12 minutes before my superhero-esque ability to make people hate me in World of Warcraft for no reason at all to carry over into Neo Steam.

There we were, just grinding away at mobs, minding our own business, when this random guy decides I personally offended him on a level he’s never experienced before, and decided to make it his personal mission to make me pay.

He starts changing his party name to things like “4v1? That’s pathetic.” and “Let’s 1v1, heal up so it’s a fair fight.” Shit like that. Now, I have no idea why this guy thought I ganked him with a billion other people since, at the time I saw him get killed (after attacking a group of people like a genius) I was completely out of steam and couldn’t shoot my bow. I was literally yelling across the room WOW, HONEY, MY BOW SHOTS TAKE STEAM, I DIDN’T EVEN REALIZE! I NEED TO GO REFILL! While watching Random-Guy-23489234 get killed.

So, he starts following us around while we’re still grinding, and we’re laughing and wondering what his problem is, when he decides to attack me. Of course, the whole “I’m so stupid I don’t understand how this PVP system works” thing came into play again when he’s standing on top of me going I AM ATTACKING YOU IN SEVEN SECONDS, I HOPE YOU’RE READY and I can’t attack him at all to maybe have some sort of an advantage. So anyway, he attacks me, my health drops to like 400, and I decide to just run away, which apparently means this random guy can never kill me ever. I seriously just kited him in circles, using my amazing clicking abilities, while Diode repeatedly shot him in the mouth.

He tried to kill me another two or three times. I still have no idea why he thought I did something to him.

Getting hit in the face with my own punchline

Well, I was planning on BLAGGING about how disappointed I was that I took a few days off from playing and open beta ended, but I revised the draft so many times it took me until Neo Steam actually went live / went gold / is retail, etc. Honestly, how could I possibly suck more at this.

Anyway, my character is still there, thank god. I’m really excited I get to play again (after open beta the servers were down for awhile,) it has a certain something to it, kind of like Ragnarok. Like, there’s better, deeper MMOs on the market currently (no offense), but Neo Steam pulls off its little charm and you can’t help but want to play it.

Now I just need to get the girlfriend finished with the Terrawhale quests on her new character she totally swears she’ll keep playing and I’ll be ready to start leveling again.

Flight of the Navigator

Thanks, honey.

Also, a quick update on the status of the girlfriend’s blog. As you can see, she has shamelessly ripped off my chosen WordPress theme and forced me into picking another one.

I would complain more but I don’t feel like sleeping on the couch.

But, let’s be honest. It’s hard to be angry at someone when you’re having this much fucking fun. Look at that. We are on giant lizard things. And they’re chasing meat. LOOK AT THAT. I mean, of course I got over the theme thing pretty fast, mostly because I love her, but, okay no, it was the lizards. Look at those lizards. We are riding on lizards. Fuck. Yes.

LiZARDS :>

I was lying when I said I was looking north

Working hard at getting that TP.

As I write this blog I am grinding away in-game, as you can see. Sitting in this thing reminds me of how you could drop off one of your Pokemon at that trainer guy’s house and leave it there for like two years and he’d level it up for you.

I just walked to the store and came back to literally over eight million TP. That is cool. You know what else is cool? I spent the whole walk actually talking about Neo Steam with Firetrucks. That is steamin’. I’m gonna start using that more often. Steamin’.

We finally both hit level 20 today. I don’t know why I said “finally” there. It doesn’t really take long to do. We did three quests inside a terrawhale. It was marvelous. It’s always been a life goal of mine to frolick around inside a giant land whale thing only to eventually be defecated back into the town I was bound to, so today was definitely a day I’ll remember for the rest of my life. At the end of the level 18 terrawhale quest there was a level 30 boss spawned. We were both lucky we got to team up with a total badass named Nimbus who warned us we might get exploded by said boss. It was probably the first fight of the game that actually had my adrenaline pumping since every time my healing spell cooldown was up I had to blow it. Nimbus actually did die midfight but I had, luckily, decided to pick up the ressurection spell while we were actually in the terrawhale, so I got off a clutch rez –> heal and he was back in the fight. It was steamin’.

Well, at least someone is happy.

I also couldn’t help but notice how excited my pet was about the upcoming whale shit we got to be.

In the sun I feel as one

I can't help but feel Firetrucks' constant loving-of-the-Pom race has to have something to do with the love of her ugly cat. Yes, that is her (our) real pet. Sigh.

Boxes were cast out of Heaven right after Satan was.

Kind of a cotinuation, or revisitation, of my previous blog. While we were still in the Taxn starter area we had lots of fun doing the quests scattered throughout.  Like I had mentioned before, the levels seemed to go by faster. I remember exclaiming proudly that I felt as if I was Conan the Barbarian during one particular adventure (pictured on the left.)

So far I have to say, being Elerd is way better than Rogwel. The buffs you get seem pretty sweet compared to the… whatever Rogwel get. To be honest, I don’t remember Rogwel having anything special during closed beta, I guess I just wasn’t paying attention. According to Chimichanga87′s rant in general chat, Rogwel get “waaaay kewler accezories and we juz get dum bufs???” I don’t remember any accessories.

Here's a few things that make time pass slowly.

Really though, the only pain in the ass quest so far was this one where you had to crack open these nut-looking-things and kill a beetle that runs out from it. You only had to do it about seven times (if I remember right) but it took a good 30-45 seconds, at least, to actually make the beetle run out. It really slowed things down and kinda halted the action.

These things, they take time

I couldn’t help but chuckle at the name of Firetrucks’ blog (current version pictured on the right.) After finally deciding on it she announced it was “probably just a placeholder” and began applying every theme available on WordPress to her site before she decided on one. Which she still isn’t sure she wants to keep. I really wouldn’t be surprised if I woke up tomorrow and she was using the theme I chose.





A Dryleaf Piyo King goes Super Saiyan level 9000 as we hit it in the face.

We finally both logged in, on the same continent, got into the same group, and started doing the same quests. It was every bit as magical as I dreamed it would be. We hit little goofy things in the face, we hit big goofy things in the face, things were hitting us in the face.

I am unsure if there’s any sort of penalty for being grouped and doing quests and such together, everything seemed to be going much quicker now than before when we leveled separately during closed beta. We spent only a few hours clearing the starter area and left the land on a giant zeppelin at a burly level 14, Nothing with her giant anvil weapon thing, and myself looking like some sort of catgirl cosplaying Vincent “Ruff Stuff” Valentine.